


Give Me Mal or Give Me Death

by xirokkun



Series: well ig i accidentally am into swapfell sans now (wip title lol) [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Swapfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underswap (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Undertale Multiverse | UTMV (Undertale), Arguing, Biting, Blood, Dirty Talk, Dubious Consent, Ecto-Genitalia (Undertale), Ecto-Penis (Undertale), Ecto-Tongue (Undertale), Enemies to Lovers, Fighting, Hate Sex, Hate to Love, Idiots in Love, Light BDSM, Locked In, Love Bites, Love/Hate, Mutual Pining, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Other, Past Abuse, Post-Coital Cuddling, Rape/Non-con Elements, Reader-Insert, Sarcasm, Shameless Smut, So much swearing..., Swapfell Sans (Undertale), Swapfell Sans Being a Jerk (Undertale), Swearing, Tsundere Swapfell Sans (Undertale), Underfell Sans (Undertale), Underfell Undyne (Undertale), Underswap Papyrus (Undertale), Underswap Sans (Undertale), Verbal Abuse, gender neutral reader, no pronouns for reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 13:42:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28689609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xirokkun/pseuds/xirokkun
Summary: "They're both idiots, your honor" - literally everyone looking upon you and Mal. Therefore, Stretch took it upon himself to throw you to into his brother's room telling you two that you have to start "getting along" or you'll be stuck together for a whole day.
Relationships: Sans (Swapfell)/Reader, Sans (Undertale)/Reader
Series: well ig i accidentally am into swapfell sans now (wip title lol) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2165637
Comments: 3
Kudos: 76





	Give Me Mal or Give Me Death

**Author's Note:**

> i'm blaming tumblr for this --  
> okay so i've. had this need to write a hate fucking fic for a while. dont ask idk why lmao. but with everyone teasing me for liking mal on tumblr, well, it seemed fitting.  
> though, I have to say? I usually write OC's or reader-inserts with a bit of me right? Makes it easier. But this reader-insert? not like me at all lmao.
> 
> Also, Mal calls the reader "princess," and it's like, supposed to be an insult for the most part;; but i couldn't really think of a gender neutral equivalent;;; I was gonna go with "darling" but that is too much mettaton vibes for me, "sweetheart" and "doll face" is like, red's thing; and "sweetie" is just. not Mal vibes lol. if yall have any suggestions feel free to input fdbdhsab

"Fuckin' prick, get the hell off of me," I demanded, kicking my leg up and jamming my heel into his femur.

"Shut up, it'll be fucking quick." Teeth nipped at the very edges of my skin -- with how pointed they were, just grazing against it sliced oped my skin like little papercuts. I swore under my breath, kicking him in the pelvis instead. " _ Fuck! _ " He jolted back instantly, but uh, there wasn't exactly anything to kick but bone, so it didn't have much effect. He glared at me, fuming with fury. "You little bitch," he snarled. "I don't want this as much as you don't."

"Then why fucking do it?" When he came crawling back, I tried pushing him back with my leg, but he just grabbed it with his hand and used that to pull himself closer to me, pinning his arm against the other side of my head. "You realize just cause we were fucking thrown in here doesn't mean we have to fuck, you dumbass."

"Shut the fuck up, speak for yourself," he hissed. "If maybe you weren't such a little shit, we wouldn't be in this position to begin with. I don't know about you, but I have fucking  _ work _ to do. I don't have time to be stranded in here for twenty-four fucking hours while they wait for us to inevitably have sex."

" _ They're gonna fucking do it anyway, you dumbfuck _ ," I snarled. I tried using my leg on the floor to try and trip him, but in doing so, I ended up using my other leg to grip around his pelvis and bring him  _ way _ closer to me than I would have liked. Even he cursed, deep violet staining his cheeks.

"If you don't want to do this, then what the fuck was that for?" he barked under his breath. Within seconds, his hand pinned to the wall next to me snatched up my hair, gripping it tightly in his fist. " _ Huh? _ "

"I was trying to trip you, you basta --  _ haaaaaaaa -- FUCK. _ " Without warning, he was already grinding up against me, rough yet annoyingly pleasant. "Mal, get the fuck off of me, I swear to  _ God. _ "

"Swear for what, princess?" he snipped, leaning his face further into mine. "What're  _ you _ going to do, huh?"

"Get you off my dick, that's what," I snapped back, trying to find a way to kick my singular leg on the floor into his shin without falling, but instead, as it turns out, he had other plans. Mal grabbed my other thigh and pulled it around his waist, locking it in place with my other one. He chuckled for only his own amusement, probably to laugh at how lame my escape plan was or something, as he pressed harder against me. " _ Get the fuck off you bastard, _ " I hissed.

" _ We can stop when they let us fucking leave, _ " Mal blurted.

"They fucking won't for _ twenty-four hours _ you  _ dumbass, _ " I snapped, but it was too late, because he immediately crashed his mouth against mine. I tried to complain, which just caused him to deepen the kiss. He was really working hard at it, really trying to make this kiss worth the effort, weirdly enough. The fuck? I thought he was trying to get this done quickly and dirty, not waste time with this. I tried to mumble something again, but this time as I did so, he took the opportunity to part my lips for me and let his tongue inside my mouth. I fought back with all I could, but the more I pushed him back, the harder Mal pushed me to the wall. I groaned and caved, letting him roam around my mouth. His tongue was fucking disgusting. It felt like a solid chunk of jelly that was somehow made to repel the saliva in my mouth. It was also fucking  _ long. _ He could reach much farther into my mouth than he should have been able to, maybe even so much as the back of my throat at one point.

He pulled back after an absurd amount of time, my saliva trailing from my mouth to his and fading into a faint lavender the closer it bridged to him. Mal complained, dropping one of my legs for a second to wipe the mess onto his sleeve. "You humans are fucking disgusting," he sneered.

"Good. Then get the hell off of me."

"Would  _ love _ to princess."

"But you can't?" I replied mockingly.

"Will you just shut the hell up and let me do what I need to?" Mal snapped.

"Oh, because making out is part of that. Part of this supposed quickie you need to do so we can be let out of here. Right."

A low growl emerged from him as his face flushed a deeper violet. "You realize I could kill you with a single hit, correct?" His voice was threatening, but I didn't care. Also, weird flex, buddy. Why the change of subject?

"Yeah, and? It would be a mercy kill at this point," I corrected. He chuckled, seemingly smirking at the remark, but didn't do a whole lot else other than flick his eyes down and up again. "What? An empty threat? From the Malicious Sans? Wow. I can't believe you. I'm so disappointed."

"It's not an empty threat!" he insisted, letting go of my legs and instead fully pressing me to the wall with his body, his hands slapped to either side of the wall by my face. His forehead was against mine, breath heavy and low against my lips. "I said I  _ could _ kill you. Which is true. But I'm not going to."

"Lame. I bet killing and fucking my dead corpse would be much easier than fucking me alive while I still fucking hate you down to your rotten core," I suggested, honestly toying with fire here. Set him off enough and he might  _ actually _ kill me. But really, was that truly a negative? God, I'm practically suicidal.

"Sorry, princess, but as  _ ironic _ as it may seem to you, I'm not exactly into necrophilia, even if it benefits me." He swiped his tongue under my lip briefly with a laugh as it involuntarily sent a chill down my spine. "You're fucking stuck with me. But it evens out, because I'm stuck with your royal bitchiness."

"Stop calling me a fuckin' princess you piece of shit," I snapped. "At least treat me like one if you're gonna bother with the nicknames, asshole. This is no way to treat royalty."

Mal just laughed up a storm. "Oh, my  _ sincerest apologies _ , your  _ royal highness. _ Would you prefer to get the shit railed out of you on the bed over there instead?"

"Oh, mhm, that's the problem," I replied sarcastically, but that was a mistake, because immediately Mal picked me up over his shoulder and threw me onto the very comfortable and nicely made bed. Ah... I'm so sorry, Blue. You don't deserve to have your bed destroyed like this. Thank God he wouldn't be home for the next couple of days. But also, fuck his brother for locking us here in the first place thinking it'd be a funny joke.

Mal crawled on top of me without hesitation, his eyelights trailing every bit of me. His fangs flashed in a moment of practically freakish excitement. "What?" I snapped. "If you're gonna go ahead and fuck me, do it already, you piece of shit. You realize this won't make me like you at all, right?"

Mal's excitement was lost the moment I spoke. "Of  _ course _ I know that. I'm not trying to get you to like me. Hell,  _ I _ don't like you --"

"Your gaze is telling me differently," I commented. His words immediately fell silent, a fear striking his expression as if I'd just set a wolf from ready to attack to scared with its tail between its legs. An anger soon fumed across his cheeks, violent and violet, as his fingers death-gripped the sheets around me. "Wow, didn't think I nailed thst so on-the-nose. I was just messing with you."

"I  _ don't _ like you. Don't fucking flatter yourself, princess. You're a fucking bitch. If I even so much as thought you worth a fucking  _ nickel, _ I'd be nothing but a disappointment to myself."

"Let me guess, I'm worth a penny?" I smirked.

Mal had evidently had enough. His gaze flickered to life, violet eyelights glowing a dangerous aura. His hand snapped into my hair, snatching it within his fist and twisting it around to turn my head back. " _ Listen here, you little shit, if you try to insinuate that I would like _ any  _ human, much less _ you,  _ I will kill you were you lay and leave you as a pile of dust that even the most educated of individuals could not ever fucking identify. _ " 

"Sounds better than being fucked by  _ you _ of all people, gotta be honest," I remarked. "Can I get an express ticket for that ride?"

"Fuck you," he snapped, leaning down to me without the slightest of hesitation and kissing me once again. This time hurt a bit more; his teeth made haste to latch onto my lower lip, chewing at it with his sharp fangs and cutting it open without putting forth much effort. His teeth trailed down to my neck as he forced my head back more, the grip on my hair exceptionally painful. Mal didn't hesitate to sink his teeth into my neck -- not partially, not playfully. No, he straight up bit through my skin. Instantly I screamed in pain; he punched me in the arm to try and get me to shut up, but it only made the pain worse.

I could feel my blood trickling from my neck, much of it oozing beyond his mouth, but much of it he lapped at with his gross-ass tongue. Even though there was no saliva residue to infect the wound, it still stung like a fucking bitch, as if he were some kind of fucking poison entering my body. I tried once again to kick him in the pelvis, but all that did was make him bite harder. My breath started hyperventilating on its own. Mal, recognizing this, retracted his teeth from my skin, licking up the insanely bloody mess he left behind on my neck. This took a long while, because he'd bit so deep, so my neck just kept bleeding. "You fucking dumbass," I breathed. "Humans die if they lose too much blood, you know."

"Oh, really?" he answered sarcastically. "Well, then there's no matter if I just suck you dry then,  _ huh? _ You're the one who wished death over me fucking your brains out, so what's with the change of heart,  _ human? _ " His glowing eyelights trickled up to my face, his teeth shimmering with remnants of my blood. He circled his tongue around, most of it cleaning up in one swipe. "Tell me. You claim  _ I'm _ the one who likes you, but are you actually  _ so ashamed _ to like an  _ asshole _ like me that you'd rather die than admit it?"

I verbally laughed with genuine hysteria. "In your  _ fucking dreams, _ Mal. I wouldn't like you if you were the last living being on this godforsaken planet."

But he merely nosed in closer to me, a smirk pulling across his cheeks. "Are you  _ sure _ about that, human?" His voice was low and...  _ knowing. _ I could feel sweat beading down my forehead. I squeaked when I felt his hand clasping around my torso, thumb stroking over my flesh-covered ribcage. "You sure that you  _ haven't _ moaned my name  _ once _ in your sleep? Or written about me someplace you thought  _ no one _ would find it?"

A hard swallow formed in my throat. But, in a need to stand my ground, I merely sneered. "Like I said, in your fucking dreams. I hate your fucking guts, Mal. You're probably just reciting what you've done while thinking about me, you disgusting pervert."

He chuckled. "Pervert?  _ I'm _ the pervert? You're accusing me for things I haven't done. Quit flattering yourself. It's not like you're..." Mal's eyelights scaled over my whole body, his confident smile fading into a dead, awestruck gaze, scanning me over like he was trying to take in every detail bit by bit. Suddenly, I felt a drip of what felt like some kind of syrup against my shirt, and within milliseconds Mal released my hair and clamped his hand over his mouth. " _ Shit, shit, shit, _ " he muttered softly to himself, immediately leaping off of me with clear intentions of escaping, but we both knew we'd been locked in here. I slid out of bed, making my way to him myself, Mal backing up with each step closer that I took, his hand fiercely clamping his mouth shut.

His back hit the wall when he stopped. Face pure violet, Mal tried to run around me, but I snapped my arm next to his face -- causing him to jolt, a bit of purple trickling off his chin from under his hand. "So," I prodded, "you were saying?"

His brow furrowed as he swallowed hard, lowering his hand to his side and balling it in a fist. "You have  _ no _ room to talk," he hissed.

"Why? I'm not the one who just drooled on someone while ogling their entire body. Got somethin' to say for yourself?"

He was angry at first, but after a moment of silence, his smug smirk crept back to its usual placement. "At least I don't post about how I moaned my crush's name out by accident on the internet."

My fingers curled up into a fist. "So what? What makes you think it's you, you cocky bastard? Why the hell would I call  _ your _ name out by accident?"

"Oh, so you're saying it was on purpose?" Mal teased.

"I will fucking end you," I snapped.

"I'd like to see you fucking try," he fought back.

We merely stared into each other for a long while, my fist trembling with... an emotion I couldn't exactly identify. I began to notice the smirk from Mal's face quiver from existence again, his gaze lowering from my face to the rest of me once more. Fine, then, you ugly pervert, if you're gonna do that then... then I might as well too. F-for revenge.

Nothing was abnormal. It's not like I hadn't seen his body before... i-in the sense that I've  _ seen _ him before. Just -- in person. With other people. In public.  _ Clothed. _ Like  _ normal people. _ Similar outfit, too... he always seem to wear the same dull violet scarf with an outfit of pure black; his shirt was long-sleeved and gripped around his bones, the fabric lightly folding but mostly clinging around his form... His pants, too, were tight... black skinny jeans, a silver-studded belt only barely holding them up. Or... it seemed anyway... b-because the pants were so overall tight and clignging to his every form... but why... was his crotch glowing purple...

"Hey," he spoke, uncharacteristically soft.

"What?" I replied back, just as quietly.

"Do you wanna fuck?"

"Oh my God, more than anything right now."

Mal did not hesitate and instantly threw himself into me, his teeth clashing immediately with my lips. His fingers made quick work to my pantline -- though, I was already fidgeting with his belt buckle the second it was in reach. I tore it off of him, immediately unzipping the front; he threw my pants down to my feet instantly. Mal picked me up by my thighs, turning around and slamming my back to the wall. He parted the kiss only for a moment to shake off his jeans and finish tossing mine aside. I caught glimpse of what I now realized had been the glowing bulge in his pants earlier. Feeling one of my thighs go loose, Mal pulled my chin up with his hand clamped around my jaw, forcing me to look at him. "My eyes are up here," he growled lowly, a sly grin shaping his cheeks.

"I fucking hate you," I snapped. "I can't have any fun here."

He laughed. "Tell me about it, princess. I'm so sick of seeing your face. So just shut up and let me do my work."

Within seconds, Mal was locked back onto my lips, though he focused outside of the kiss as his fingers gingerly ran down my entire front. A moan croaked from my throat, causing him to press harder against me. I pulled my arms up and linked them around his neck, forcing him even deeper. I could feel his low, deep laugh rumble against me, sending a shiver down my spine.

I yelped, my leg instinctively trying to close and inevitably pulling him closer to me; the second I felt his finger press against my entrance. He pushed a little harder, all but going in entirely. Mal pulled back only slightly, just enough so he could speak his order:

"Tell me how much you want it, bitch."

"I'd rather die," I said without skipping a beat.

"I think you forget who you're dealing with here," he hissed, continuing to circle around my entrance just enough to put me on the very, very edge. My breathing heightened without my desire. "Tell me how much you want me to fuck you. Tell me how long you've been fucking hiding from me how much you love me. Tell me how long you've been hiding from me how much you want to  _ fuck _ me. Do it.  _ Now. _ "

"Like I'd ever tell you," I blurted.

But within seconds, Mal let loose of every grip he had on me, letting me fall to the ground on my ass. My head hit the wall and I cursed under my breath from the pain. "Then I guess we're done," he stated. Looking up, I even noticed that violet-glowing dick from earlier had vanished into thin air. "You'll do what I say or we do nothing at all. It's not optional,  _ human. _ " Mal literally turned around and headed back for Blue's bed, jumping into it and closing his eyes as he curled into a ball.

"Mal, you can't be fucking serious," I murmured.

"I am, princess. You can pleasure yourself. I don't do kindly to those who aren't going to listen to me," he responded.

"Mal," I whined. He didn't respond. I started standing up, my legs still trembling with desperate need, and walked back over to the bed. "Mal,  _ please, _ " I begged.

"Please, what, princess?" he prompted, popping an eye socket open as I started crawling up onto the comforter. He didn't make any effort to stop me.

" _ Please. _ " I started crawling up next to him, my hands holding painful grips on his femurs. "You're such a  _ fucking asshole. _ "

He merely smirked. "And why is that?"

"Because you won't fuck me."

"Well, I said I would, I just needed some magic words from you, princess." Mal leaned up from where he was laying, cupping my cheek in his hand as he leaned into my ear. " _ Tell me how long you've been waiting for me to fuck you. _ "

My breath was stuttered. "You first," I tried.

"Uh-uh, that's not what I said. You don't get to know from me. Tell me. Or you'll be without me for the rest of your life." An unintentional whine slipped from my throat, causing him to laugh. Mal's hands found their way down my front once more, this time circling around to my back and clasping themselves around my ass. I bit my lip almost instinctively. "Knock down your stupid fucking pride for once and tell me how much you want me," Mal ordered.

"So much," I heaved. "So fucking much, Mal."

"Mhm, go on." He pulled me a little closer to him; I swear I could feel something pressing against my front.

"I've thought you were so fucking hot since the day we met, but you're such a piece of shit. I want you every second I see you until you fucking open your damn mouth to speak," I confessed. "I hate you so fucking much, but I've never seen someone so hot in my life. I've had countless wet dreams about you since we met, constantly just relentlessly railing the shit out of me."

"Is that what you want me to do to you now?" he purred. "Fuck you so hard you have scars to show you actually had the chance to fuck me?"

"Fuck me until I'm crying in pain. Please. Please, for once in your fucking awful life, do as I say."

I screeched when I felt his finger inside me. Mal immediately started chewing at my ear, licking it relentlessly as he circled his finger around my walls. I started painting almost immediately, my hands finding the nearest thing to grip onto -- which, as I found out by his reaction, was most definitely his dick. I let my second hand follow around to his spine and forced him close to me, letting my other hand work him up and down. His presence on my ear fell to a mess of stuttered breathing, his voice uncharacteristically yipping every time I brushed my thumb against the tip. Making a sound that sounded like a growl, he stuck a second finger into me without warning, this time pumping it roughly against me. I cried out his name without even thinking about it, my hand instinctively tightening its grip -- Mal, in turn, yelped my name out in return, his spine trembling under my embrace. He leaned fully into me, balancing almost entirely with his chin against my shoulder.

It was a while before we said any comprehensible words again, so focused on what we were doing and not letting the other get the best of us.

"Fuck it, p-princess, stop," Mal ordered, pulling his hand out of me almost instantly. "I need to be inside you. So fucking badly."

"Oh, thank God, I want you to fuck me so badly right now," I echoed, dropping my hands instantly and rolling over onto the bed. "Fucking slam me into the next century, asshole."

Mal only hesitated to scour through Blue's drawers. "For fuck's sake, I  _ know _ he has some in here," he muttered in annoyance. "And of  _ course _ the  _ one _ time I need it -- oh thank stars." He slammed something shut, crawling back onto the bedsheets with what sounded like the pop of a lid. I only managed to glance over and realize he was holding a bottle of lube before he kicked my face away yelling, "D-Don't fucking watch me do this, you freak!" I just rolled my eyes. Yes. Because  _ that _ aspect of right now is what makes me a freak.

He crawled back over me hastily, but the second he was pinned over me, Mal just came to a complete hault. He locked his gaze with mine, blinking ever so slightly to glance over me and then back to my face. It was almost like he was... infatuated? Daydreaming?

"Don't get all mushy on me now, Mal," I snapped. 

He blinked and his face was back to a more grumpy expression. But even still, it was dusted with a heavy violet, his arms trembling a bit at my sides. Mal leaned down, closer to me. I let my legs wrap around him, feeling the pressure of his tip throbbing against my entrance. It felt like I was waiting hours for him to just fucking  _ go _ \-- and that's when I recognized it.

Panic.

"Oh, come on, we've gotten this far and now you're gonna freak out? Mal, please, I'm begging you --"

"Humans and monsters can't have kids, right?" He blurted. "That's not a thing. Right?"

"That's what you're worried about?" I huffed. "No, they can't. Now Mal, for the love of God --  _ FUCK. _ "

I hitched against him immediately the second he slammed as far as he could against me. Jesus  _ fuck _ \-- well, I did ask for pain, didn't I?

Mal had his face buried in my shoulder as he kept thrusting against me as hard as he possibly could. My legs kept tightening around him, my arms soon finding their way around his neck and let my fingers dig into his shoulder blades. He grunted against my skin, picking up speed almost instantly.

"For fuck's sake, M-Mal," I heaved. "Stop being so damn... p-perfect at everything..."

He let go of a laugh that fumbled into a breathy groan. I thought he'd opened his mouth to start responding to me -- but instead, his fangs latched around my collarbone. I shrieked, my nails scraping against his back. He hissed against my skin, evidently trying his best not to just straight bite through me. He eventually just retracted his teeth again, swirling his tongue around the wound to lap up as much of the blood as possible, all while still continuing to thrust against me like it was a natural motion he did on the regular. Satisfied with the mess he'd cleaned up, Mal began to speed up a bit more. I hitched a breath, slamming up against him in response. He yelped slightly.

"Just a bit more, p-princess," he heaved. "F-fuck, you feel so  _ fucking _ good... better than I imagined."

"So you  _ did _ dream about fucking me?" I teased.

"Shut up, you did, too," Mal snapped, a grunt falling from his voice. "At least I didn't fucking p- _ post it online. _ "

"Just keep going, asshole," I sneered. "I'm... fuck, I'm so fucking close."

Mal grunted in agreement, almost immediately picking up the pace one last time. My body took full control of the situation, my consciousness completely ceasing. Breath hitching up, stuttering, my entire body shaking and every grip quivering. Mal once again bit into my shoulder, but he didn't break skin this time; he held a tight grip on the sheets just below me, moaning loudly against me as if he'd bit down on my shoulder just to keep his own mouth shut. I kept wanting to scream and cry with every second that passed, but I couldn't. Something was missing from my throat and not a word fell out.

Well, that was until --

" _ MAL! FUCK! _ "

My voice was so loud and high pitched I was almost 100% certain the whole house had heard it. Maybe even the neighbors.

But my whole grip loosened, feeling my interior filling up entirely.

To be fair, Mal's cry was just as loud, he'd merely muffled himself against my arm.

The second I felt him exit, the purple illumination dimming almost entirely, Mal flipped over onto his back. He was panting heavily, even despite his lack of need for air. I just stared at the ceiling for a long while, my brain still circling and spinning.

" _ Fuck, _ " Mal blurted. His voice was slightly muffled; I glanced over and saw his hands were covering his face. "... _ fuck, _ " he repeated.

"Yes, that is what we just did," I teased.

"Oh, shut up," he murmured, hands falling back down with a slight smirk to his face. He turned to face me, his eyelights still shimmering brightly. He didn't break eye contact this time, not trailing anywhere else on my body. "Probably a dumb time to say it, but better late than never," he started, but I cut him off.

"What? You think that was a mistake?" I barked.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? I haven't even said anything yet and you're already accusing me of bullshit." That glimmer in his eyelights started to fade as he turned to face the ceiling. "It's...  _ fuck, _ I don't have any fucking idea how to say this." Mal grumbled to himself. "Look, I've never actually hated you, alright?" He huffed. "There. I said it."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better for everything that you've done to make me feel like a piece of shit?"

Mal didn't respond. He didn't mock me, he didn't sigh, he didn't say anything. He just kept staring at the ceiling. I waited, hoping maybe he was just thinking of something to say, but I waited a very long time. I could practically hear the ticking of the clock -- there was a clock in here?

I began to roll over when Mal gripped my hand, stopping me from doing so. I waited again.

His mouth opened to speak.

"I...

"... I'm sorry.

"I'm sorry. I... I don't know what to say. I know I'm a piece of shit. I've been nothing but horrible to you. There's no excuse for how I've treated you, and you have no reason to care about me. I..." He sighed, squeezing my hand a bit tighter. "I know this is stupid, but... when we met, and I saw you for the first time I... I fell in love immediately. I've never felt this way before. I didn't know what it was, but I just had this unnecessary need to be by you all the time. It... It was getting in my way. I couldn't focus on anything else. It was driving me insane. I couldn't work, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't do anything. So I just... fought it. I thought maybe, if I made you hate me that I'd no longer care about you, but instead it just backfired. It hurt. It hurt to see you feeling like shit, even more because  _ I _ was the cause.

"You don't have to forgive me. You don't have to accept me. I'll just go back to my regular life and pretend this never happened. Hell, I wouldn't blame you for just calling me insane and walking out the door right now." Mal glanced to me for a brief moment, eyes falling to my lower half before meeting my eyes again. "Well, maybe with some pants first.

"But yeah. If this comes off as me begging for pity or something stupid like that, I don't know, I'm not. I... I don't fucking know what to say. I'm just an asshole. That's really all there is to it. Sorry."

Now it was my turn to be quiet for a while.

Mal seemed a lot more impatient than me; his hand's grip on mine was trembling, every time he tightened his grip he loosened it even more than before, as if he was preparing to drop it soon, but holding onto it for the very last few moments he could.

I laughed softly. Mal tensed instantly.

"You  _ are _ an asshole," I replied, "but you know what you also are? A fucking dumbass."

Mal looked insulted, but I continued before his input. "Look, I know having wet dreams about someone isn't exactly proof of liking them, but, fuck. I'm fucked up too, y'know? Yeah, you've treated me like nothing but shit, but, like... my brain apparently thinks you're hot enough to be exempt from me totally hating you. Which in turn made me hate you more -- because, what kind of idiot falls for someone who's constantly verbally insulting them?" I sighed. I noticed Mal's grip began to relax, holding my hand more naturally. "Me. I'm that idiot."

The silence was filled with the ticking clock once again. I thought I'd heard some noises from downstairs, but I really wasn't sure. Besides, it's not like it was shocking to hear.

Mal, still holding my hand, sat upright, glancing down to me with half a smile on his face. "Dumb question," he started. "Do you want to start over?"

Following suit, I pushed myself up from the bed, a smile pulling at my lips that I couldn't stop it. "Are we counting fucking before or after the starting over?"

He burst out in laughter. "I don't care. You choose."

"Hm... I'll say it was before. That way we can have our first time again," I teased.

"Stars, you're stupid," Mal chuckled.

"Thanks, I try."

There was that damn shuffling again from outside. This time it was on this floor, though, that much I was sure of.

"What?" Mal asked.

"Do you hear that --?"

A fumbling noise at the door. Something being move from it.

Oh no.

_ Oh no. _

"Hear what?"

The door swung open.

There were about four or five people at the doorway.

I froze up as if it was a survival instinct.

"Guys."

Blue's brother, Stretch, was the one that opened the door. He looked somewhere between disgusted and laughing.

"I knew you two liked each other. But I didn't even leave this place locked for 20 minutes and you ended up fucking."

"I told'ya I fuckin' heard somethin' earlier," Red, who was behind Stretch, mumbled as he turned who was standing next to him, which seemed to be Felldyne. Even further into the crowd was Rus... who started slinking back downstairs after spotting Mal, his brother, in here like this.

"Okay, okay! I believe you! Stars, Red, maybe you shouldn't be paying so much attention to whether or not people are fucking, you perv!" Felldyne retorted.

"It's not my fault they were fuckin' loud!" Red snapped.

I noticed Mal got off the bed amongst their argument. He walked up to the door and shoved all of them outside. "OUT!" he snapped. " _ OUT! _ "

He slammed the door on their giggling. Mal locked the door from the inside this time, mumbling to himself angrily.

"By the way, you guys are definitely going to need to wash those sheets before Blue gets back!" Stretch's voice echoed down the hall. I looked down below me and -- oh God. They were... stained with red and purple. From my blood and his--

"I fucking hate him," Mal complained, climbing back up onto the bed. He didn't hesitate to hug me tightly and tackle me back into the sheets. "Anyway, I'm tired. They shouldn't bother us now at least."

I heaved a laugh and rolled my eyes.


End file.
